Saturday morning.
It's time for Envy to attempt maturity.
She ensnares the phone with a heavy hand and punches in Mouse's numbers.
Ringing.
It really was Envy's fault, whether she'd like to admit it or not. The confrontation was superfluous; it was the guilt Envy had been shooting for. With Mouse, it was always the guilt.
Ringing.
Envy sighs, and thinks about giving the situation over to divinity. Or perhaps divinity has already prompted her to reconcile.
Beep, Greeting.
"Hello?" Mouse asks, in a manner so polite Envy almost wants to believe she doesn't have Caller ID.
Words rush. “I’mSorry.”
Beat.
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This one I like, but it feels less complete than the previous two. I mean, obviously they're all little fragment pieces, but this one read much more like "EXCERPT!" than the other two did. I love the present tense writing though; that's really hard and you pulled it off wonderfully.
ReplyDeleteKEEP WRITING THESE! AH LUVS THEM!
Very nice. Excellent excerpts. They really leave me wanting more.
ReplyDelete<3 PRESENT TENSE. :3 Present tense is like my little baby....
[When did Shannon read Virginia Wolfe???? '~']