She always wanted to believe him.
She was the strong one, the one who saw the threats before they emerged, fought them away, and he was the one who sat in their victory's wake and dreamed.
“Darling,” she screamed, shaking him one day as he traced fingers over blueprints of disaster, “you’ll turn the air so that our lungs won’t take it!”
He looked at her very calmly, grinned a soft lunatic’s grin that she loved so.
“Oh, but my darling,” he kissed her forehead. “Oh, mydarling-mydarling-mydarling-” He smoothed her cheek. “We won’t need lungs to breathe.”
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I'm a bit lost here. What is the setting? This seems like it could have been an Asimov short talking about machines. Some would destroy the atmosphere and others would let us breathe the remains. I greatly enjoy the dialogue (I think it's fantastic even) but I think a word or two about where these people are might serve the piece.
ReplyDeleteI see where you're coming from, AHW, and while I agree that clarified setting would add a unique and powerful element of atmosphere, I personally think that the ambiguity lends to the focus on the characters and their relationship - and subsequently paints an old-movie-blur feeling over the piece. I think the lack of setting specificity works for this particular piece well by highlighting the emotion behind the characters' interactions. :)
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